THE SCIENCE BEHIND A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP
5:1 Ratio - Happy couples have 5 positive interactions for every negative one.
0.8:1 - Couples who ultimately divorced have just 0.8 happy encounters for every one negative interaction.
The quality of their FRIENDSHIP with each other: The determining factor in whether couples feel satisfied with the sex, romance, and passion in their marriage is, by 70%.
Happy Couples Talk More: People in the most successful marriages spend 5 more hours a week being together and talking.
Cultivate Positive Interactions Every Day:
- Give a compliment
- Show your appreciation for something big (or small)
- Relive a fun memory
- Do something nice for them
In the Bedroom
- Make Time for Intimacy - The happiest couples have sex 2 to 3 times a week.
- More Sex = More Joy - People ar 55% more likely to report higher levels of happiness when they have sex every few days.
- The Once-a-Week Boost - Having sex once a week makes people 44% more likely to have positive feelings.
How Do You Respond to Triumphs?
When it comes to strengthening your relationship, studies show that the most crucial factor is how you celebrate your partner’s GOOD news.
In one study, people who did this 3x / day for 1 week increased their happiness and felt less depressed afterwards.
- They show enthusiasm
- They ask questions
- They congratulate their partner
- They relive the experience with them
Couples who have NEW experiences together report feeling more loving and supportive towards one another, and more satisfied with their marriages.
Share an Experience Together
- Go for an evening walk
- Dine at a new restaurant in town
- Explore a place you’ve never been
- Cook together
- Go to a concert
The Michelangelo Effect - Couples in the happiest relationships bring out the best in each other. They help each other get closer to becoming their "ideal" selves.
Remember the Time We Cracked Up Over __________?
In one study, couples who were asked to recall a moment that involved "shared laughter" reported being more satisfied in their relationship than those prompted to recall positive moments in their relationship.
What’s Your Fighting Style?
When happy couples fight, they tend to defuse the tension:
- Showing humor
- Expressing affection
- Conceding on certain points their partner makes
Unhappy couples tend to do the following when they fight:
- Show contempt
- Roll their eyes
- Act defensively
- Resort to name-calling
- Tune out
Marriage and Your Happiness
Based on a 20-year British study, the people who are happiest with their marriages:
- Have been married 5 years or less
- Don’t have children
- Have college degree
- The man’s employed
Marriage leads to a big happiness boost for 2 years, on average. After that, couple’s happiness levels tend to return to what they were prior to the engagement.
A happy marriage is worth an additional $105,000 a year in terms of life satisfaction
Experiencing the death of a spouse is like losing $308,780 a year.
Why Get Married?
American couples reveal why they got hitched
- 93% - Love
- 87% - Making a lifelong commitment
- 81% - Companionship
- 59% - Having children
- 31% - Financial stability
Think Positive: Couples who can put a positive spin on their marriage have a 94% chance of experiencing a happy future together.
How Do Kids Impact a Couple’s Happiness? (Immediately following the birth of Baby #1):
- 33% feel just satisfied (or more satisfied) than before
- 67% experience a big drop in marital satisfaction
- Married couples are unhappiest when kids are in preschool
- Couple’s happiness levels increase again once the youngest kid has grown up
compiled by the good folks at Happify
photo credit: Jessica Claire / Amorology